The Eyes Have It

So as we move off the Body Language segment, there are some things I'd like you to remember:

• Body Language is a series of unconscious gestures that display our emotional status and thought processes.
• Most body language gestures are the same world wide but remember we are products of our culture and environment....do not jump to conclusions rashly.
• Gestures are refined or modified and become more difficult to interpret:
• as we get older and wiser
• to protect or enhance our images - public figures, speakers, , managers, teachers, lawyers, politicians etc.
• when we believe we have valid motive - if we convince ourselves that the motive is valid then we have better control over our gestures
• for deception- sales people, con artists, criminals, pathological liars
• To truly understand body language one must become an observer of people, not just specific targets:

Here are a few BL Observation exercises you should try:

• watch a favorite movie with the sound off
• sit in the car park and observe the passers by
• go to the mall or coffee shop just to observe...not just the people you are attracted to but all
• in meetings (stand up, board room etc) observe the other participants, particularly for announcements etc.
• Look for subtle signs shown by politicians, news reporters, interviewers, reality show people on tv.
• Observe, observe, observe....but don't be a stalker

submitted by Kathy Thomas

Liar, Liar

Oh what a tangled web we weave, When first we practise to deceive!

Sir Walter Scott, Marmion, Canto vi. Stanza 17. Scottish author & novelist (1771 - 1832)

We all do it. Lie. For those of you, giving a vigorous shake of the head right now or eyebrow lift or head tilt....YES, you too .

Think about it. We all come with guises that force us into deceitful positions of varying degrees. As parents, we lie, Santa, Easter Bunny, birds and bees .......as employees we lie, about our reviews, confidential information, departmental secrets.

We call lying all sorts of names: fantasy, tact, comic relief, sensitivity, secrets, vows. Lets classify Liar's body language and varying degree of skills. Level one: Fibbers Level two: Scammers Level three: Paths (Pathological Liars)

Action	Details	Skill Level
Spatial Avoidance	Liars are generally uncomfortable facing those they lie to. Creating space between them and the victim.	Fibbers Scammers Paths
Hiding	Hiding behind objects, desks, doorways, counters etc.	Fibbers Scammers
Face/Mouth Cover	Direct mouth covering to lightly touching areas around the mouth, steepling on the lips etc.	Fibbers Scammers
Fidget	Nervous tapping, foot shaking, collar adjustments, lint picking, organizing items	Fibbers Scammers
Posture Changes	Crossing legs Tensing of shoulders	Fibbers Scammers
Eye Contact	Eye shifting and not looking directly at counterpart is a good indicator but the direction of the shift could be useful: Up-Right (Creating a visual lie) Right (Creating auditory lie) Please note down right is recalling feelings, not lying. Down-Right (Kinesthetic)	Fibbers Scammers Paths
Smiling	Plastering a smile on faces, giggling	Fibbers
Fake smiling	Smiling with lips only eyes not smiling	Fibbers Scammers
Slowing down	Walking and speaking slower	Scammers Paths
Behaviour Deviation	Any extreme changes in behaviour could possibly a sign of lying.	Fibbers
Delayed Emotion	Not displaying the appropriate emotional behaviour when making statement, but a few seconds afterwards. Often cutting the emotion short after it is displayed.	Scammers
Defensive	Displaying defensiveness behaviour instead of offensive behaviour	Fibbers Scammers Paths
Indirect Statements or answers	Avoiding using direct statements and quote that he said, she said. Answering with questions or humour	Fibbers, Scammers
Unnecessary Details	Giving far more detail than necessary	Fibbers,Scammers Paths

Body Language - Hands

THE KEY is OBSERVATION The Hands In politics, campaigning and ruling politicians are taught the secrets of body language as the mere flip of a hand can convey messages that can sway votes and polls. What are you reading from these hands?

Lesson:

Make it a point to observe the different hand expressions this week.