Friday, May 25, 2007

This Is Why I'm Hot

WHY
................................................................................................................................................................................................................ Understanding WHY people act and think the way they do is essential for the development of people strategy. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, We must first understand that human beings are very complicated: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, PERCEPTION - Gather Information about our world: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, We use all our senses to see, smell, hear, taste and touch the world. This sensory information is gathered, selected and organized in a unique way and this becomes our perception. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Articles on Perception So you keep collecting and interpreting life in your special way and this influences certain areas in your life. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Personality: Your personality is an organized set of characteristics that influences your thinking, motivation and behaviour in different situations ................................................................................................................................................................................................................ Motive Motivation is having the desire and willingness to do something. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Emotions Emotions create a response in the mind that arises spontaneously, rather than through conscious effort. These are essential to understanding WHY ............................................................................................................................................................................................ submitted by Kathy Thomas

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The Eyes Have It

So as we move off the Body Language segment, there are some things I'd like you to remember:

  • Body Language is a series of unconscious gestures that display our emotional status and thought processes.
  • Most body language gestures are the same world wide but remember we are products of our culture and environment....do not jump to conclusions rashly.
  • Gestures are refined or modified and become more difficult to interpret:
    • as we get older and wiser
    • to protect or enhance our images - public figures, speakers, , managers, teachers, lawyers, politicians etc.
    • when we believe we have valid motive - if we convince ourselves that the motive is valid then we have better control over our gestures
    • for deception- sales people, con artists, criminals, pathological liars
  • To truly understand body language one must become an observer of people, not just specific targets:
Here are a few BL Observation exercises you should try:
  • watch a favorite movie with the sound off
  • sit in the car park and observe the passers by
  • go to the mall or coffee shop just to observe...not just the people you are attracted to but all
  • in meetings (stand up, board room etc) observe the other participants, particularly for announcements etc.
  • Look for subtle signs shown by politicians, news reporters, interviewers, reality show people on tv.
  • Observe, observe, observe....but don't be a stalker
submitted by Kathy Thomas

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Arrogant BL take Two

Believe it or not there are more ARROGANT body language postures in the spectrum of movements.

So I'll take this opportunity to give you a few non verbals and throw in some para verbals. Para verbals refer to the tone of the language.

THE STARE

Ground Rules for the stare

  • It gets to be uncomfortable if you go much beyond about five seconds of eye contact. Five seconds is all you need for connection.
  • In a conversation no more than 60 % of the conversation should be eye contact.

Anything more will be too intense and can be misinterpreted as arrogance.

Too Much Space

Look out for those who take up too much space.....either by invading your personal space, wide stance, crossing legs at the ankle, increasing their volume to fill the space. (Paraverbals)

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Who are you?....who, who,... who, who...

I'm a CSI fan, but I have a preference for David Caruso's Las Vegas counterpart, whose character is intellectually humble. David on the other hand is a study in arrogance. You've got to check out his one liners and Jim Carey's version of him in the videos. ..................................................................

I before e..........
Except (put the sunglasses on) after c bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
Are you dealing with an arrogant SOB or are you one? ................................................................................................... Here's a few BL tips to look for or avoid using.
Do I have to listen to this?
Smirk - The look:.. One eyebrow hook look down your nose curl at the corners of your lips
I see much better this way.
Talk to the Hand!! Many Hand gestures indicate arrogance some more subtly than others
Finger point - These are commanding gestures and give off dominant signals.vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
You look lovely tonight.... ...........................................................................................................................................................................
It's just over there....no over there..
Palm down - Please! , Are you kidding me? Heil Hitler!
Yes!!, I spelled it right!
Thumbs Up - Yes Thumbs up can be an arrogant gesture....look for it in hooked suspenders and in pants pockets. submitted by Kathy Thomas

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Liar, Liar

Oh what a tangled web we weave, When first we practise to deceive!

Sir Walter Scott, Marmion, Canto vi. Stanza 17. Scottish author & novelist (1771 - 1832)

We all do it. Lie. For those of you, giving a vigorous shake of the head right now or eyebrow lift or head tilt....YES, you too .

Think about it. We all come with guises that force us into deceitful positions of varying degrees. As parents, we lie, Santa, Easter Bunny, birds and bees .......as employees we lie, about our reviews, confidential information, departmental secrets.

We call lying all sorts of names: fantasy, tact, comic relief, sensitivity, secrets, vows. Lets classify Liar's body language and varying degree of skills. Level one: Fibbers Level two: Scammers Level three: Paths (Pathological Liars)

Action

Details

Skill Level

Spatial Avoidance

Liars are generally uncomfortable facing those they lie to. Creating space between them and the victim.

Fibbers Scammers Paths

Hiding

Hiding behind objects, desks, doorways, counters etc.

Fibbers Scammers

Face/Mouth Cover

Direct mouth covering to lightly touching areas around the mouth, steepling on the lips etc.

Fibbers Scammers

Fidget

Nervous tapping, foot shaking, collar adjustments, lint picking, organizing items

Fibbers Scammers

Posture Changes

Crossing legs Tensing of shoulders

Fibbers Scammers

Eye Contact

Eye shifting and not looking directly at counterpart is a good indicator but the direction of the shift could be useful: Up-Right (Creating a visual lie) Right (Creating auditory lie) Please note down right is recalling feelings, not lying. Down-Right (Kinesthetic)

Fibbers Scammers Paths

Smiling

Plastering a smile on faces, giggling

Fibbers

Fake smiling

Smiling with lips only eyes not smiling

Fibbers Scammers

Slowing down

Walking and speaking slower

Scammers Paths

Behaviour Deviation

Any extreme changes in behaviour could possibly a sign of lying.

Fibbers

Delayed Emotion

Not displaying the appropriate emotional behaviour when making statement, but a few seconds afterwards. Often cutting the emotion short after it is displayed.

Scammers

Defensive

Displaying defensiveness behaviour instead of offensive behaviour

Fibbers Scammers Paths

Indirect Statements or answers

Avoiding using direct statements and quote that he said, she said. Answering with questions or humour

Fibbers, Scammers

Unnecessary Details

Giving far more detail than necessary

Fibbers,Scammers Paths